I can’t describe where I am in life right now but it’s where I’m supposed to be. Not that I’m supposed to be without her, but that I’m still supposed to be driving around places from my past reminding myself for a reason. I’m still supposed to be losing sleep. I’m still supposed to have crying fits in the shower or in the car on my way into work. I’m still supposed to be afraid of walking in her room, and of time passing, and of saying goodbye. I really don’t want to say goodbye. I’d rather have this feeling forever than to have to say goodbye.
Taking this month to myself has been one of the best things I’ve ever done.